• Uncategorized

    Mixtape Magnum Opus

    So I’ve been working on this for quite some time (which doesn’t make it any good).  I just wasn’t sure if I was actually going to ever post it, but here goes.  Enjoy my neurosis! In an episode I watched of Californication (which fucking rules, by the way), the 12ish year old daughter of the main character(s) gives a mix tape (CD) to her older teenage guitar instructor that she has a crush on.  All well and good and mostly innocent, but in a way I’ve come to loathe the practice of giving someone a mix tape.  Unless, of course, it is done for all the right reasons (to be discussed…

  • Uncategorized

    The Dixie Dude Abides

    So several years ago, Drew and I used to go to karaoke every Wednesday night.  It wasn’t so much that we went to karaoke night at the bar on Wednesdays, it was more like we went to the same bar almost every night and Wednesday happened to be karaoke night.  Needless to say, we opened up the show almost every week with the old country standard “You Never Even Called Me by My Name”.  We’d usually follow that up later in the evening with a performance of some Dixie Chicks song.  It sounds lame, perhaps, but usually we could con this amazingly hot waitress to sing with us and we’d…

  • Uncategorized

    I Understand Now, Mom, Only This Time Was More Awkward

    So I was hanging out with some rockstars last night.  No really, I was.  And many rockstar stereotypes  were proven true over the course of the evening, all the good ones anyway….more on that in a bit, background first… So one of my best buds, Drew, as many of you may know, works in the radio industry.  He has this cool habit of meeting many famous people, and most of those people dig him.  He’s definitely memorable.  In fact, the first time I actually met him I already knew who he was, and he was even using a different name (Andy).  Anyhow, we became good friends some 9 or 10…

  • Uncategorized

    The Art of Picking a Theme Song

    So let’s say someone commissions you to pick a “theme song” for them.  How does one go about picking the perfect theme song?  I know what you’re thinking, “Great question Ry, how DOES one go about picking the perfect theme song if someone were to ask you to pick a theme song for them?”, yeah I know, it happens to me all the time too!  Just kidding… The way I see it, you’ve got three different options… Option 1.  Pick a song that the subject would like.  Sadly enough, I have a friend who would love her theme song to be “Just a Girl” by No Doubt.  Yeah, I think…

  • Uncategorized

    Are You My Mother, err… Father?

    So I’m driving home yesterday and someone had called my celly while I was at work and left me a voicemail.  I hadn’t ever seen the number before and I set my phone aside for a bit to enjoy one of RJ Reynolds finest while I was sitting in traffic.  I forgot about the voicemail for about 15 minutes or so when I got bored sitting on the road and decided to give it a listen. “Hello, this message is for Ryan Morgan.  This is suchandsuch (can’t remember her name) from Dr. Burns office.  We just need you to call us back about a paternity thing. You can reach us…

  • Uncategorized

    Time Can’t Change Me, I Can’t Change Time

    So the other day, this girl walks into the store (for those of you that still don’t know, my servitude to the local camera store has yet to expire).  She lived in Jefferson City and she purchased a camera from me.  More importantly, she was cute, nice, smart (went to Baylor University), has some dough (she is a lawyer), likes to talk (she is still a lawyer), single (at least no wedding band which is good enough for me), had most of her teeth, was breathing, and seemed to enjoy talking with me (that or she faked it very well, which is certainly a possibility).  Basically, she could have help…

  • Uncategorized

    A Light-hearted Exploration of Types

    So the other day, this girl walks into the store (for those of you that still don’t know, my servitude to the local camera store has yet to expire).  She lived in Jefferson City and she purchased a camera from me.  More importantly, she was cute, nice, smart (went to Baylor University), has some dough (she is a lawyer), likes to talk (she is still a lawyer), single (at least no wedding band which is good enough for me), had most of her teeth, was breathing, and seemed to enjoy talking with me (that or she faked it very well, which is certainly a possibility).  Basically, she could have help…

  • Uncategorized

    I Met Jesus, He Bought a Camcorder

    So this guy comes into the store the other day, true story.  For those of you that don’t know, I work at a local camera store in St. Louis.  The guy, Andy, tells me that he’s a preacher.  Naturally, this sparked my interest because I like to talk about religion.  I attempt to ask the guy a few questions about his church and his beliefs, but those were pushed aside because he was pretty interested in purchasing a new camcorder.  He said he would be using the video camera to record his sermons amongst other things.  We narrowed things down to a camera that was nearly twice as much as…

  • Uncategorized

    What Are You Gonna Do?

    So I just found out this evening that an old friend of mine, Steve Noblin, passed away.  He was a month older than I am and we had known each other since we were about 12 or 13 years old (the 7th grade).  As it turns out he had some kind of liver problem and he unexpectedly died before they could figure out what it was (not cancer or sclerosis).  He was a good guy and blah blah blah…Steve would NOT like me to go on about how cool he was or any of that nonsense.  He would probably try to kick my ass for saying anything along those lines…

  • Uncategorized

    Spontaneity Rides Again

    So in case you care, I had a great and fun weekend!  It all started Saturday morning when I asked my boss if it was my last day at work and he said yes.  I said goodbye to everyone and was gone by 11:15.  I drove home, played Battlefield for a couple of hours, packed my shit, and drove up to Quincy to hang with my boys and other assorted folks. The first thing I did when I got to Quincy was to head out to the Quincy Speedway for Budfest.  I met up with Drew and Torrie (thanks for getting me in for free!!!) and we proceded to drink…