Child of the 80s or 90s?

So because of my addiction to myspace…I was browsing through all the people on here who claim to have graduated from Fox.  I came across this girl that just graduated this past year.  When I went to her site she had this blog on there about how she was a child of the 90’s.  I claim shenanigans!!!

I think there should be some official rules to what decade you can claim.  I was born in 1979.  Common logic would suggest that I could claim to be a child of the 80’s.  I think this is hogwash, I’m a child of the 90’s!  Why do I make this claim?  Think about it for a second.  I firmly believe you don’t remember anything, culturally speaking, until you are AT LEAST seven years old.  For instance, I was 6 when the Cardinals went to the world series in 1985, but I don’t remember anything about it, however I do remember the ’87 series against the Twinkies when I was 8.  That’s more than half the decade I have no f’ing clue what was going on. 

Sure, I now know many of the things that happened pre-1987, but I don’t remember any of that crap as if I was there….Even the tv shows, Silver Spoons, Small Wonder, Webster I remember watching, but I have no clue what was going on.  Who doens’t remember Ricky Shroeder and the train inside the house or the little girl robot, but besides those main details, what else was there?

From here on out, I don’t think you should be allowed to claim a decade unless you spent at least half of your formative years living in it.  For clarity sake, we will say the formative years begin at age 10 or 11 (sixth grade).  Using this method, that would mean I couldn’t even begin to claim the 80’s until 1989 and obviously there is much less than half a decade for me to claim.  Therefore, I’m stuck claiming the 90’s.  And hey, what do you know, I sure as shit remember rolling your pants, starter jackets, and hypercolor shirts.  I wasn’t quite sure how The Wonder Years Started, but I remember how it finished.  And who doesn’t remember when Mike Seaver brought Leonardo DiCaprio home on Growing Pains?  Now I’m not saying you can’t like certain things from other decades, I love Family Ties and hair-metal, but I can’t claim to have been a fan of either in the 80’s, unfortunately.

Now there are probably exceptions to this rule, but I’m proclaiming it as OFFICIAL!!!  So there you have it “hot 18 year old girl from Fox on myspace”, you are officially a child of the new millenium, not a child of the 90’s (it’s ok not to know where the zip 90210 is located or to remember who The Great Cornholio was).


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